Rewind

Some memories are all that remain,
To soothe that roaring burning pain
A balm, to ease that burden still
Of eyes,looking out that window sill…

What good are they, I ask, O Lord
They only bring us more heartache
That rocking chair, an empty cupboard
Leave all but tears in their wake

Sounds,from yesterday,and years past
They rush and fill our ears today
A whispered call, a laugh, and at last
They slip and slide and fade away..

Those wretched memories remind
That we are but dust, to dust we’ll go
And what good comes when we rewind
Except tell us, we’re the Lord’s dough..

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saying goodbye to grandpa… :(

To say that death is only the beginning is true. Only in death do we see life for what it is and what it means to us.
My grandfather taught me many things, chief among them was to live life on ones own terms. He taught me to walk, to wave, to talk, to behave. It takes a man, to make a man. He is the one who gave me my name, my identity, a mind to think with, and the eyes to see the world with.
And I am grateful for the Lord’s blessing that I was raised by him.
It takes a man with a big heart to have lived life the way he did, to have cared for and brought up our family the way he did.
It takes a man with an even bigger heart to live that life in the service of others, in humility and obscurity as most of us were witness to.

I daresay he took pride in very few things, those being his ability to keep his word, the confidence that he would always do right by himself and his God , and last but not the least, in me.
Today, most of all, I miss his smile. His clap on my shoulder, his sign of the cross and the short prayer blessing me whenever he saw me.
He always asked me when I would get married. I was lucky enough to have him with me,when I got married, when I had my baby. She was lucky enough to be loved and blessed by him, for however short a time.
Today, I am happy that he is finally reunited with his mother, who he craved for ever since he was born. Talking about her was the only time I ever saw him cry.
Countless times he held my hand as I went through every day of my life. Today, I would give the world to hear him say ponnukutta once again.
The world may know him in many ways, but to me he was, is and always will be the gentlest, greatest and most beautiful soul to have ever walked this earth.
Wherever you are, I know you are looking after me. Thanks for everything. You will always always live on as a part of me, in my heart, mind, blood and soul.